I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
