you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Randomize
