I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Randomize
