You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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