areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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