Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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