It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
Randomize
