the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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