I just cut my nipple shaving
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
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