highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Someone came in the potted fern
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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