And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
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