thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
