So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize
