Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
Randomize
