who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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