i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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