I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
