no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Randomize
