No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
