i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize