You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Randomize