Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
