I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize