Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Randomize
