I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
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