is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
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