i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
just found out that she named her cat after me.
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
Randomize
