every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
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