So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
Randomize
