Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
I think my moral compass just broke
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