Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
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