drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
he shaved USA in his pubs
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Randomize
