Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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