there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
Randomize
