ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
You're breaking my sexual little heart
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize
