Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Randomize
