i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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