You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize
