I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
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