Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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