I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Randomize
