I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
If its not for food we ain't going out.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
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