Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
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