so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Randomize