id be glad to
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
