We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
You made out with two different species that night
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
