so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
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