My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize
