I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Randomize
