At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize
